AAm I just an option to him?

A benchwarmer is a woman or a man who is dating someone, who is keeping them around as an option. They don’t really like this person enough to give them a long standing meaningful relationship, but they give them just enough attention so this person thinks they are on the verge of a relationship.
Sometimes this gets a little bit more complex, with what I like to call advanced game. Sometimes the benchwarmer is actually given a relationship, when the person they are dating “settles” for them however the person who has settled will never be 100% happy with or satisfied with the relationship. In both scenarios the common thread is that the person you are dating thinks they can do better than you, but keep you around by giving you just enough so you wont leave them high and dry with no options because as they say one in the hand is better than two in the bushes. So how can you tell if you are a benchwarmer?
A lot of the times when I coach women, I realise that they are so infatuated or in love with a man that they disregard whether the man actually feels the same way about them. They ignore major red flags, lazy and inconsistent behaviour, broken promises and general “not good enough” treatment. What they don’t realise is that people treat you the way they feel about you. If a man tells you that he loves you but when it comes round to meeting up he cancels or even forgets that there even was a date. Don’t believe his words, believe his actions. Actions are a reflection of intentions and beliefs and his is that you are not his priority. Men know that women loves words, that’s why a lot of women will value a few texts messages, phone calls and “I love yous” over actual solid plans, showing up sweeping you off your feet behaviour. Talk is cheap. Remember that and you will not be disappointed. So does he like you or nah? Have an honest discussion with yourself if you have to even ask this question then the answer is probably nah not so much.
Sunsu Bee / July 23rd, 2022 / Uncategorized