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Whenhe makes you insecure

We all have moments when we’re not feeling our best. We all also have things that when pointed out can make us feel insecure. It could be a physical trait (and it often is) or even something based on our habits or personality.

We should always be working on our insecurities so we can overcome them, especially so we dont let anyone exploit them. This is definitely the case when we are dating or in a relationship.

Our insecurities can make us act emotional, crazy and even controlling, therefore we need to know what to do when were faced with a situation that causes these to be bought to the surface

Let me put this into context. A couple of days ago, my boyfriend got home late from work, and as far as I was concerned, he was looking forward to seeing me.

We decided to watch a movie together on the couch, when all of a sudden he started talking about my weight. He began saying that I was becoming big and that should lose weight. Now when he began talking about this i could feel inside that my anger was beginning to rise.  But being the high value woman that i have taught myself to be and as Greta mentions “controlling my emotions” I did my best to hide it.

I hid it not only because emotional control is a key factor in becoming high value, but also  because i didn’t want him to know what I don’t like about myself and am insecure about so he cannot use it to manipulate me!

Ladies, if a guy knows your weakness, he will always find a way to bring it up. It’s like exposing the belly of a zebra to a hungry lion. He will always try to push your buttons and use it to hurt and manipulate you. If you react you will show him that you care, and that he has control over you and that’s the last thing you want.

No since my guy had started a serious talk about my weight, I did something very smart that he did not see coming. I TURNED IT ALL AROUND ON HIM. 

He said he thought I should lose a few pounds on my legs and my bum. I looked at him and instead of getting angry and emotional, I said “I know what my body needs, I am happy with my body”. He started talking again at which point i told him with a “poker face” expression that “that’s not very polite”. He replied that some things that are not nice to hear also need to be said. I told him that there are things that I also do not like about his appearance, but do not tell him because it’s not a big deal.

As I said this, his eyes literally popped!

He asked what I don’t like, and I obviously told him. I mentioned that I don’t want to say it in case it might hurt him. He told me to give it a shot…and so I did.

Ladies, you will never believe but I listed everything that I could think of, appearance wise and as I did this I could see that his insecurities started to kick in. He started looking at the ground and turned his eyes from me, he suddenly wasn’t that confident anymore. He didn’t respond after that. He clearly didn’t like the taste of his own medicine. Since he noticed that I am confident about myself and that I did not show my insecurities, he began to see me as a confident and strong woman. This is one of the biggest attractions for men. In the evening he told me that he loved me and oh, by the way ladies I haven’t heard anything about my weight since!

Sunsu Bee / August 29th, 2021 / Life Coaching