Loneliness | Relationship Coach for Women

Onlinedating and relationships

A LOT of women are dealing with online dating and all the situations that are coming along with it.

Many times women will start talking to a guy that they’ve met online, he will be very charming, chat to her a lot and spend time on the phone with her too. The woman will start to fall for the guy, however they haven’t actually even met yet.

If you have been talking to someone online for a few weeks or even months and the time finally arrives for you to meet in real life, it can be a daunting  and difficult to understand how to behave in a way that will make him fall for you more.

One thing that you must understand is the difference between men and women. Women love to talk, let’s be honest we love to share our day, we love to vent and we love to discuss our feelings. This is the way women bond with each other and become closer to one another. Men on the other hand bond through shared real life experiences and “fun” activities together. So just because you have been texting and talking to him for a few weeks and it feels like you are very close to him and even as though you’re both in a relationship, realise that for him, he doesn’t feel the same way. The first time you meet to him will be just that, your first date. It won’t matter how much you have spoken beforehand.

Another important factor you must understand is that men are avid game players; this is due to their testosterone levels. Men who are very smart and know “the game” use this very low investment of “texting and phone talk” to hook a woman, seduce her and skip all the “real life” investment, because they know that the way to bond with a woman is by talking to her. This way they disarm you with little to no effort and get you straight into his bed.

Don’t fall for this game ladies. Remember the saying actions over words and you will never go wrong.

So what is the best way to handle the online to offline situation in dating? The first thing is to realise that by talking to a man online for long periods of time, you are fulfilling your love need not his, you are becoming attached to someone you have never met and who doesn’t share your feelings yet. Then it’s important to understand, the more you talk to him online and share about yourself, the less reason he has to meet you in real life. Keep things breezy online, don’t overshare, so if he wants to know more about you he has to ask you out.

Take things slow from this first date, he still needs to impress you, and show with actions (not just words) that he is worthy of your time. He needs to keep taking you out and investing in you in real life before you can agree to be his girlfriend.

Sunsu Bee / August 14th, 2021 / Life Coaching