OvercomingLoneliness
It’s really interesting because a lot of people get in a relationship because they don’t want to be lonely but if you getting in a relationship for this reason (warding off loneliness) then once you actually get into it, you might actually still feel lonely believe it or not. The number one reason for this is because, you will start depending on your partner for your own happiness and when your guy is pulling away from you (which he inevitability will, you will start to self-pity, victimize yourself and even self-sabotage but overall you will feel lonely
So what is the best way to not feel lonely in a relationship? Simple answer, make yourself happy. What’s the best way to not feel lonely out of a relationship? Make yourself happy.
Long answer, how can you make yourself happy, in and out of a relationship?
- Don’t give up the things that you love
A lot of people, especially when they enter into a relationship will, stop doing the things that they love. For example, if they always went to yoga on Saturdays, but now have stopped completely because their beau is only free on Saturdays, it will mean they are cutting things out of their life which will make them happy when they are not with their partner, which is a recipe for unhappiness all round. You should always keep things you enjoy as part of your life, that will give you time away from your partner. So instead of dropping yoga completely take a Sunday or weekday class instead after work, so you have something to look forward to and keep you focused on you. Men love a woman who has a life outside of them.
- Keep a close circle of friends
Just like people drop their hobbies they also drop their friends when they are in a relationship. They rely on their partner to share everything with, the thoughts, feelings and happiness, so when their partner isn’t available they feel sad and disconnected and lonely. This is why you should always try and make time for your good friends, whether you are in a relationship or not, as they can be pivotal in helping to maintain a healthy level of mental wellbeing. Don’t let work commitments or other life commitments stop you from spending some down time with your mates.
- Be careful what you allow yourself to think about
Your thoughts are actually more important than your feelings, and both are very closely linked. If you’re thinking negative thoughts of self-pity, victimizing yourself etc day in day out, you will actually start to become sad, anxious, overwhelmed and lonelier. Try and combat your negative thoughts by replacing them with a positive one. Try and look for that silver lining. So for example, if you think, “my hair looks awful today, I don’t feel confident” try changing it to, “I’m going to try a different hairstyle today and give my self a fresh new look!”. I know that this is easier said than done, but if you keep trying, eventually it will become easier with time.
Those are a few tips on how not to feel lonely, absolutely not an exhaustive list by any means, but I would love for you ladies to share more ideas in the comments below!
