He likes me or nah?

Whyasking a man for attention has the opposite effect

Women often come to me with this complaint, they are dating guy that the really like, there is just one really big problem that they cant get over! He is just not giving her as much attention as she wants! She is smitten over him, she wants to see him as often as she can, talk to him more and just be around him as much as she can. But hes just not stepping up to the plate and she just cant understand why. More often than not, these women will then take matters into their own hands and try and confront the guy over this lack of attention. They will usually confront him, message him or just tell him that they expect a lot more from him and he needs to step things up! What they don’t realise is that men who are confronted with this either, change for a short amount of time and then revert back to what they were like before or not change at all or ignore what she has just asked, or even worse, sometimes they just vanish! Well I’m here to break things down for you as to why this happens and what you should do instead.

  1. Firstly its about quality over quantity. You don’t need to talk to him every single day to keep him interested. Actually the less you will talk to him the more interested he will get. The more you will talk to him on the daily basis telling him your whole life story, the quicker he will get bored. Ladies remember Mystery is the power of seduction. Mystery is attractive. Let him wonder how your day has been and what you are up to. Rather than not leaving anything to the imagination to the imagination at all, furthermore it will give you more to talk about when you actually meet up.
  1. You can’t ask the guy to give you more attention and talk to you more.
    He will just rebel. He needs to want to talk to you, he needs to want to come to you. You asking him to do that will just make him pull away. When a guy is being pushed to do something he doesn’t want to do freely, he will either comply temporarily to stop the nagging or ignore completely or leave. The point is you cant make a man do what he doesn’t want to do.

What should you do instead then? If you confronting him wont work, what will? The answer is simple. Pull away a little bit. Let him come to you. It is ok if he is not texting you every day. Concentrate on your goals and ambitions. Keep some mystery. Don’t tell him your every move. Let him wonder. Same as your mind wonders when you don’t know what he is at. Same goes for his…

If after trying this he still isn’t coming after you, then guess what he just wasn’t that into you to begin with. Men will go after what they want and everything else is just and excuse.

Sunsu Bee / January 9th, 2021 / Life Coaching